Step Away From the Cake

  If you were un-fragile, un-weak, strong, if you were Weakless right now, what would you gain? What would be easier for you? If I was weakless right now I think it would go towards my mindfulness because I would not have to think about those things that made me weak. I would be able to focus on the things that matter to me and not spend time or mental energy thinking about all that nonsense. Also, it would make me more confident and sure of myself if I choose to do new things. New things can be scary, but if weakless I would not be scared to try them. Not that I really am now, but there are always doubts in the back of my mind when I try something new. After answering the other questions, I also think that it would allow me to do the things I'm slightly afraid of now but really want to do. I want to do a long hike, like days, but I don't feel I'm in a physical or mental place to do that. I want to join group hikes but feel like I won't be able to keep up physically so

 This group that I belong to has been holding a Revitalize week. This is a week where they are trying to inspire us more and restart some serious self care. They are also introducing the next level of self care, they call it the Weakless Challenge. It's a 7ish week program that has really hard things to do every day. Cold blasts at the end of your shower. Long meditations, like 30 minutes, Yikes!!! And a bunch of other things. So initially I read through them and thought, meh... But I've decided to go all in. I'm going to lay out the assignments each day in my planner and then check them off as I go. I have felt for a really long time that I'm right on the edge of something, I'm really hoping this will push me over the edge.  We had an issue with the hot tub about 2 weeks ago. Because of lack of care, we had gotten calcium deposits all over it. All. Over. It. Ugh. We had to go to the spa store and find out how to fix it, vinegar, then buy some chemicals for it and b

 So I started the Happy Back Challenge about 10 days ago (I'm one day behind on the challenge because I skipped a night for no good reason) and it's hard. It's showing me some places that I thought were a minor problem are actually a major problem. Like my right shoulder. I injured it a long time ago in Crossfit and I knew that it wasn't perfect, but this challenge is showing me how bad it truly is. The good news is that it seems to be mostly a mobility issue and so this challenge should help restore that mobility. I also did the Hip Opening Challenge back in November and it was amazing. My back/hip were feeling awesome. The best they felt in years. I was even walking different. It was awesome. Then, I like to say I flew too close to the sun. I felt so good I decided to try running again. I really, truly love running and thought it would be a good idea since I felt so good. Wrong!!! I got new minimal drop shoes and headed out for what I thought was a very conservative r

 I had this whole post I was going to write about how great my back and knee were feeling and how I seemed to be making great progress with the Happy Back Challenge and the Hip Opening Challenge. I do those stretches/strength every night before bed and my back/knee has been feeling awesome. Well, I woke this morning with a twinge in my back. Hmmm....I know that progress is not a straight line and definitely up and down, but UGH!!!  Also, we return to school today. UGH!!!!  No really, things are good. So I have a small twinge in my back, big deal, I'll get over it.  The self-care group I belong to is making some changes this week. I hope they are good because honestly I was losing interest in it. It had become extremely repetitious. They've been hold FB lives every morning but haven't really been saying much. Monday they announced 'Motivational Monday's' - okay. Yesterday I'm not even sure what they announced. Maybe they were telling us about how the focus wa

 First, it's a holiday and we have the day off. Yay!!! But I woke up at 5am and the power was out. Ugh!!! Still got up because our power company is pretty good and usually gets things back on quickly. But it took about 2 hours today. I have a little book light so I read for a while. I scrolled on my phone for a while and then I dozed in my chair for a little while. Then, boom the power came back on. I noticed while it was off how quiet the house is. When it came back on I immediately noticed the hum of all the electrical things.  In other news, I belong to this group on FB that is about a workout program I use on the Oculus - which is a total blast. One of the things I noticed about that group right away is the extrinsic motivation for using it. Has anyone lost weight using it? I've been doing it every day and haven't lost any weight!! Look I can see muscles!!! Ugh!!!!  I get so tired of reading these things. Can't we do it just to do it and have fun with it? Does every

 When I was in my 20s and 30s I was a voracious reader. Voracious. I could not keep enough books around. Then in my 30s I went to college and was forced to read stuff I didn't really enjoy. That sort of destroyed my joy of reading. I still read for fun, but it took forever to finish a book. Before college I could sit and read an entire book in an afternoon. After college, yeah, no. And for years I've been like that. I enjoy reading but it seems to have lost all the joy I found in it. Then I decided to redo the front room. I've posted about it before, but here is a picture of it all complete.  This has become my favorite room in the house. On the weekends when I'm not in a rush to get going, I will meditate, blog, and then sit in there and read until Hubby gets up. I will even go and sit there in the middle of the day and read if I have nothing pressing to do. I simply love this room. And it has sparked my joy of reading again. I have a number of books to read in that bo