Step Away From the Cake

There are parts of this blog that I really, truly hate because it is all a bunch of whining. I don't delete it though because it reminds me that I do that. Well, the last few posts have been of that variety. Whining. Excuses. And nothing much getting done. I need to change that and I need to change it now. I have spent the first 3 weeks of my break basically sitting on my butt. It is time to get things rolling again. Part of the problem, and yes, this is an excuse, is that I got this stupid diamond painting thing that I'm kind of obsessed with. I probably spent 5 hours working on it just yesterday. It is almost done and I think it will help when it finally is done. The thing is I sit and work on it while I'm rewatching Arrested Development to catch up for the new season that came out last week. I've been letting my desire to do those 2 things overrule all other desires. So I'm faced with a dilemma. Do I continue to work and get this thing finished that will free u

So the thing I've been struggling with most is getting my steps in. I have not hit 10,000 steps in probably 3 weeks. The closest I've come is around 8,000. Not good enough. So I came up with an idea this morning. What if I broke the steps down into smaller pieces and set times for them to be done?  So if I want 10,000 steps and I'm awake from 5:30 - 8:00, that means that every 3 hours I need to have about 2,500 steps in. So it's 7:30 right now and I have 1,410 steps. I need another 1,000 steps in 1 hour. That's easy. So I need 2,500 by 8:30 am; 5,000 by 11:30 am; 7,500 by 2:30 pm, and 10,000 by 5:30 pm. That would have me finishing up my steps right around the time we walk the dogs at night. Perfect. That seems so much more doable than sitting at 6 pm and looking at 8,000 steps that need to be done. So I'm going to give this a shot today and see how I do.

I tend towards depression. I truly believe that about 12-13 years ago I fell into a deep depression. I really did not care about anything. I stopped caring about keeping the house clean or doing anything good for myself because I felt it was all useless anyway. Then we went on vacation, our truck caught fire and we got evicted and weird as it sounds, that caused me to snap out of my depression.  I was forced by circumstances to make a change and that change resulted in my being snapped out of my depression. Once I realized what was wrong, I realized that I needed to pay close attention in order to not get dragged down again. Since then, I have been depressed a time or eight, but as soon as I realize what is happening I take actions to counter it. Also, and I think it's because I'm more aware, I try not to let it happen. Well, it happened. Ever since school got out I've been a little off. My last couple of posts are how I haven't been able to get my steps in or how t

My well-laid plans of yesterday did not pan out. I did get some school work done and I did get on the treadmill a couple of times, but I did not get 10,000 steps in, I only got 5,800 - which is better than the 3 previous days, but not what I wanted. So I need to try again today. Same plan, just more conscious effort to do it. I also need to go somewhere. Anywhere. Just out for a bit. I may go cruise Target for no reason other than I can. I may go to Famous Footwear to look. Or maybe Ross's. I don't know. I don't really want to spend money, but I need to get out and it's too hot to go anywhere outside. I did avoid Facebook for long stretches yesterday and that was good. I got more accomplished because I wasn't scrolling for hours and hours. So I need to keep that up. I did not set a timer when I got on it, but I did not stay long anytime I was on. I am going to use my mindfulness and not beat myself up, but use yesterday as a learning experience. Okay, that