Step Away From the Cake

par·a·digm shift noun a fundamental change in approach or underlying assumptions. Most of my life I have been an instant gratification type of person. I gave little thought about the future and just did what I wanted to do. Not a good way to live. Over the last few years, I've been shifting my way of doing things, but it is not easy and it is not perfect. But I am trying. Now I am at a point where I have to make a huge paradigm shift if I wish to live the way I want to. Let's examine this. I am approximately 18 months from completing my Ph.D. In order to make that happen, I have got to be consistent, diligent, and organized. I have to write, write, write. All of the suggestions by people who have completed a Ph.D. say to write everyday, even if it's only for 15 minutes, write every single day. Don't break the chain. That is not something I have been doing. I tend not to do school work during the week and save it all for the weekend. I have to break that habit. I ha

I have kicked some nasty habits in my time. I quit drugs. I quit smoking. I quit binge eating. Yes, some are worse than others but they were all just habits that I needed to change. Quitting drugs and smoking was tough, but honestly not as bad as beating binge eating. I could make sure that I didn't have drugs or cigarettes around, but there was always food in the house. And binge eating was a very unconscious thing. Smoking was unconscious also, but with no cigarettes around it wasn't an issue. So binge eating was my toughest habit to kick so far. At first I did it so unconsciously that I did not even realize it was happening until it was over. When I decided it needed to go, I started to notice it as it was happening. I still couldn't stop it, but at least I was aware it was happening. Over time I gradually started to notice it earlier and earlier. Eventually I was able to notice it before I did it and was able to stop it. Now I haven't had a binge episode in years.

So I have been trying to get my eating and working out under control and I do not seem to be making any progress. In fact, I feel worse today than I have all week. Of course, I have not been as 'good' as I should. I've had dessert more days than not. I have missed dinner more nights than I care to think. I just cannot seem to get it under control. I'm not sure what to do. Of course, Magnum ice cream and lemon bars are not going to help at all. I need to get my act together and I need to do it now. How do I do that?