It's becoming a rough week.

-
I should always go with my instincts. On Sunday, when I was looking forward at my week, I realized it was going to be a tough week. There are things going on and I knew by Wednesday I'd be tired. Then, Monday night, I had myself a rethink and decided it wouldn't be as bad as I thought. Well, guess what?? It's shaping up to be as bad as I thought. The worst part is, it's not any one thing that's bad, it's a bunch of little things that have to be dealt with and they piss me off and create stress and ugh!!!

So, basically the alarm went off this morning, I pulled the covers over my head and rolled over. No way. Plus it's been really freaking cold here in the morning!! Really cold.

I have a whole lot of things rolling around in my head right now that I just don't feel like getting into. I know I haven't been commenting much on the blogs and I apologize, I just can't seem to find something to say. Also, I feel like such a slacker. Everyone is running, biking, swimming, getting ready for their season to start and I don't have a season this year. This year is totally focused on weight loss and base building so I feel like a lazy bum compared to most of you guys :)

Also, you know what's been on my mind?? In 11 days I turn 48. Now generally age doesn't bother me. But for some reason this one is causing me to really think. Honestly, when I was in my 20's I couldn't imagine being 48. Also, being so freaking spontaneous and childish, I didn't plan like I should have. Plus, I'm really thinking about my life. There are things I want to do and I'm not sure working a 9-5 job is part of that. I want to spend time at home. I want to have the time to train and exercise when I want. I want to travel. I realize now, as I approach 50, that there's so much more to do in life. I don't want to be tied to a job in a building. I want to find a job that will go with me when I need to move, but that will pay well. So that's a lot of the reason behind the paid posts and stuff. I'm searching. Up until this point in my life I've just kind of traveled along the path of life. I didn't really search out things they kind of fell in my lap. Now I'm on the quest. I think I finally know what I want and I'm trying to find the way to make it happen. 48 is still pretty young. I have plenty of time to change my path in life, but that's why I want to do it now. I don't want to be 68 saying "I wish......"

Okay, it's awfully early in the morning to be dwelling on such deep thoughts. I had better get my butt into the shower and off to work or that 9-5 job will be gone sooner than I want it to be :)

Comments

angelfish24 said…
I know what you mean by not planning my path in life, I just let it happen. I started a few years trying to plan a new career at least and am still following that path for 2 more years. God, hate going back to school but it's necessary.
I know they say, we regret more the things we didn't do in life rather than the things we did. I would love to travel more too but it's not feasible now besides a trip to vegas or close by nowadays.
Hope your week is going better soon!!
11:18 AM
Vickie said…
I think its fairly common to be having all these doubts about your life at this point. I went through he same thing, and actually it took about 3 years to sort through. My mom died when I was 48 and I was instantly turned into a caretaker for my dad, even while my kids were then almost all out on their own. Also, I was going through a divorce and was going through some major financial setbacks, so it was a rough year for me too! You will get through this, and keep in mind that we're here for you! I didn't have all you guys back then or I might not have turned to some destructive behavior I did at the time (heavy drinking). Reach out, we'll be here!
3:03 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

There are many ways to measure success,

-
and today I found yet another one. The Great Aloha Run this morning was just awesome. I didn't break any records, it was not my best time by far, but I think this was one of my best races ever. After getting up at 4 a.m., driving to the finish line, catching a bus to the start, standing in line for the port-a-potties(more on this later), I still found myself with over 45 mins before the race started. So I found a place to sit and people watched for 1/2 an hour - that is always fun. Finally, at 6:45 we headed out to the start. One of the things the Great Aloha Run does is they have the Sounds of Freedom. These are military units from all over the island that run in formation singing cadence the whole way. They line up on the side of the road and they have a silent start 8 minutes before the race starts. It's always a special sight to see them go. I'm a flag waving fool and when I see our military I just get all gushy. I feel so proud to live in a country where young
Read more

Colloidal Silver

-
colloidal silver is very fine particles that are suspended in liquid, usually water. This apparently has antimicrobial properties and has been used externally to treat wounds and burns to prevent infection. Working in the lab we get lots of nasty, nasty burns. You ain't been burned till you've been burned with hot sodium hydroxide - yow momma!!!! Anyway, we always kept a jar of colloidal silver around and used it on burns. It not only helped it heal it seemed to reduce the pain. I don't know how it just did. Now, some folks think you should drink this. They say it has antibiotic properties and is fairly harmless to drink. I don't know if that's true but it sure would be nice if it was. I hate taking antibiotics for a number of reasons. It would be nice to be able to drink something and have the same thing happen. colloidal silver has also been used to keep potable water drinkable for long periods. This sounds like some pretty amazing stuff. Being the scien
Read more

My blog is great!!!

-
Look to the left there. My blog has been rated by blogged.com as Great!!! I scored 8.5 out of 10. Woo Hoo!!! I don't normally get excited over things like this, but I'm on a mission to create great blogs and this is just a little validation. So for some reason I was incredibly busy last night and stayed up way past my bedtime. As a result I didn't get up this morning. Well, that and the fact that is was freaking cold. We are in this spring weather cycle where it is warm and beautiful during the day, and cold, cold, cold at night. Makes for good sleeping but hard getting out of bed. Fe-Lady is raising funds for a really, really good cause. Go here and help her out why don'tcha. In my humble opinion there is not enough we can do to help out our American Heroes. So go, give, it'll feel good...... That's it for now. I need to get some work done.
Read more