Step Away From the Cake

I just finished reading Mia's post and boy did it hit home for me. Basically she had reached the end and was ready to throw in the towel and quit. Just quit. Give up trying and admit defeat. That really struck a chord in me and really got me to thinking. I've been there. I've been in that place where I am willing to accept that I will be overweight the rest of my life. That I will never be an athlete and that I will never be what I want to be. While this may not be a good place to be mentally, it really does serve a purpose. In general, once I reach that point, just totally give in to my "defeat" things usually start to get better. Total acceptance is what really allows you to finally and ultimately change. In the past, once I've reached that point of total acceptance I could usually start to do things better. I found the energy to exercise more regularly because I wasn't trying to reach any great ideal, I was simply trying to get healthy. I wasn't lo

I haven't felt much like writing lately. I haven't even been commenting on other blogs much even though I am reading them. I just feel like I have nothing to say. Actually, I'm undergoing a paradigm shift and until it's complete there is nothing to talk about. I used to kind of stumble through life and not give much thought or attention to what was really going on. Now I know, in minute detail, the things that are happening inside and outside. I like it but I'm afraid I spend too much time thinking about them. I need to find a balance between the thinking and non-thinking. Anyway, things are changing. I've been exercising - good. I'm slowly working in my 2 a day (can't just jump right into that, at least I can't). I did not exercise yesterday as I had an early doc's appointment and I did not exercise this morning due to fairly heavy cramps, but tomorrow for sure. Eating has been going well. I have reached a stage where I am not hungry.

Well, here it is Tuesday and things are going well. I think I have found a WW meeting I like. The Monday night meeting right near the lab has a leader I really like and the group seems lively. I'm going to try it for a couple of weeks and if it still fits transfer there. Exercise has been going well. Sunday I went on an hour bike ride. It was a picture perfect morning and I realize that I now live in an unbelievable place to bike. The back roads around my house are full of flower farms and smell incredible right now. The main road leads to one of the most scenic places on Oahu. This is the coast that I live along, Hello, pretty sweet biking. I rode along this coast up to Sea Life Park. Sea Life Park is the home of the Wholphin. A cross between a whale and a dolphin. In fact, they just had a wholphin baby. Generally crosses like that are sterile but the wholphin bred with a dolphin and they had a baby. Pretty sweet. So yeah, I'm happier and happier with my new place. Now if the

Okay, it begins today. I can't believe how motivating my post from Friday was to me. Sometimes writing things out and reading them really make a difference (I've read it 4 times and I'll probably continue to read it). I wasn't going to begin this journey until Monday but I've decided, why wait. There is no time like the present right??? So, Game On!!!!! In my mind this weight loss effort has become my own Ironman. I need to get through this challenge before I can move on to the next. So it's one workout at a time, one meal at a time, everything in the now not the later. Nothing has any power over me except my ultimate goal. I have to keep that vision in mind. I'm going to print out a weekly workout schedule and hang it right next to my computer. I'm also going to print out my goal weight and post it there too. That way these things will be constantly in front of my face and a reminder of where I'm headed. Unfortunatley, this blog will be d